You Should Have Thought of that Before

Again

- This is not about me
- You should smile more


Doing it again
Seamless airplane naps
Skinny man moving in stop motion
Unworldly beauty (moon)
Surprise (easy)
Relief

Intensive talk/lies
Being on the other side
Dough

Awaiting solitude

Drained by screws in boxes
Backwards energy by tools and findings
Getting lost by mansions
Fish heads and role play in partnership
(It's just an offer)
Lesbian looks (or envy)
Sold

Two days in and I’m too funny
I like them so much

No cheap meals, tone of voice
Shoplifting
Missing to observe large details (more and more)
Space, moon and the deep sea, vertigo/upside down
Polite
Evident important constant reminder of nature
(Vegetarian, single, alcoholic and goofy)
With you, 2. 5 minutes
Stares (or sadness)
Everything burned
Missing him and him

Who are they?
Traumatized by fire.
Car filled with couples

Lost patience
Double identity person/artist
More poetics/ocean air
Giving
Finding ways around
Zooming out and forgetting presence
Fish soup and eating disorders
We are children

Monday and free of guide
Material hunt
Soup syrup
Home late from studio, trials

Complete confusion and frustration
Got logged out and dropped my phone

Fantastic day,
Potatoes and clean food
Cleaning, throwing out fish corpse
Writing, staying home
Restlessness but calm
First rain

White skies no sight
Usual morning coffee with them
Free bus and another hunt for material
Wanted to find someone
Complete exhaustion
Googled safety nets
Half size curious young woman

Started doing dishes, got manic

Can't get enough of me

Escaped to studio
Dinner people laughter high
Flirt conversation lust and no closure
Horrible eyes and karma (strange girl)
Sit here, come here, talk
Stoned and Escaped

Woke up late and slow
Fires
Frozen pizza
Went to studio
Sent a message
Went home

Made fire
Read and finished
Helped v
Made a dinner mistake
Walk, light weave
Threw arrows, so bad, rain
Birthday
Bed bookless

Had a good start
Computer, studio
Received stress, gave out too much
Confused, Depressed
Gave too many advice, listened too much
Very short day, new book

Wrote
Went to every pub in town, they were empty

Headache of builders
Computer, writing
Quit job
Fire

Sun
Studio, dough
Visit by A
Dinner by C, asked for salt
Party and post-internet
Failed flirt, near panic attack
Bar
Young man, very

Late morning
Studio
Smearing
Tiredness
Nap
Early in the morning
Sleep
(In absence funeral)

Headache and sounds of lovers in the house
Hours of staring on a screen
Encounter in the food shop
Compliment on braids

Different layers in the brain of emotions

Tiny fever, heavy head
He is free again
More potatoes
Tiny gallery, walk, scanning the space
Compliment on braids
Carrot soup
Staring on tv
Flirt? Stoner? Too thin/manly. Drunk?
Not many thoughts

This place has no smell
Small towns and its life I’m impressed that it works, I would be hated in a month
But after the rain the air is velvet to the lungs

Cold
Oatmeal and made jam
Ikea, Biltema and lunch beige plastic string and nets
Got contract
Talking badly about someone
Walk over the bridge through hoards of junkies drinking coffee, looking down to not see their eyes
Walk through the harbor happy to see humanity at its most honest side
Rain material shop pink nylon fabric
Got string from old man
Walked to bus heaven and ocean in the same dusk grey beautiful color
Asian shop
Walk back
Pho soup
Fire
Application, tutorial
Dizzy from sleepiness
Bed

Amazing. Speechless. Obsessed.

The jogging group
Look notes
Material that lasts longer than the material of my body, me?

Talk in the studio about talk
Don’t reflect me like that, please

Walked up a mountain
Walked through
Cough attack on bus
Studio
Not well yet
Downer, Went to bar, tried again
Decided on not finishing

Late morning
Again walk into town
Wasting hours
Benedict eggs
Looking for jeans

Leaving for studio
Finally all of the text on the page
Sour face on woman
Presentation
More edit than is visible
Weed smoker, non-sexual
New Girl almost smashing her head
Most intimate hug again
Stayed in
Stomach pain

No construction noises
Allowed to slow down and newly baked bread
All art gallery shows - beautiful building
Almost free brie lunch, fire tasting kale, shoplifting
Buying boxes and another walk home
Potatoes
Getting fat missing home
Writing finding a mail to F
Erasing my homepage
Honesty is not synonymously with truth

Waking every morning but not meditating, too many sounds of other people
But Sunday, started cleaning
Wrote O, cried
Wrote F
Hate goodbyes
Made tofu and rise
Erased most of my edited persona
Called mother, cried
Stopped the first movie, watched a different one.
Paid debts
Cleaned out studio
Packed boxes and sent them to myself
Long lunch with them
Met a new woman and went to a too long talk about teeth
Had sushi with her and missed V
Met V, went to bars, telling secrets
Late night parmesan snack
Shower
The half full moon is right outside my window

Construction
Packing
Felt my face swollen
Message from M, he’s a shadow
Mother trying her game making me
Very late for meeting w TT
Last errands on town
Potato dinner,
V had left
Sleep
Night message from M

Last morning
Snow
Hate goodbyes
Bus-bus-plane, remembered I’d been to that airport before, on my way to him, that time with a sprained ankle, while coming from somewhere else, seamless sleep, lost my scarf